Pages

Friday, December 17, 2010

Pause to Reflect

On wed, I finally had the CBD( urine bag ) taken off. It was a day early from the original schedule due to Hubby's request to the Dr. After 2 weeks of walking around with it, it was such a great relief to get rid of it! At first I was afraid I might have trouble to urinate, but all went well. I also hoped it would be freedom for baby Airis as well. But her SB didn't go down below 150. So kena le pegi amik darah selang shari. Kesian kat dia especially kalau ada sorang nurse tu amik darah. Kasar kut coz adik baby mesti nangis klau dia yg amik darah.
Since I'm feeling much better now, I had time to reflect what I've been thru the past few weeks. I really thank Allah for giving a chance to raise my kids & see my new princess. ( I only got to see her the 2nd day after birth as babies are not allowed in ICU). She's a sweet baby & didn't make a fuss ( according to the nurses at maternity ward). May be she knew her mama was so sick & she had to behave :-)
When I saw the 1.5L mineral water bottle, it dawn on me that I had lost the equivalent of 2 1/2 bottles of blood (3.8L). Then, I count my blessings that I'm still around. That nite in the ICU, I had fever & rigors, they had to put warm blanket on me. The PCA morphine helped a lot in bearing the pain. I know others had gone thru worse experiences, but what I've been thru really had me so much to thank for.
I'm grateful to my loved ones who have been there for me & been very supportive & helped me for a speedy recovery.
These SMSes that I received just before the op made me appreciate the senders so much..
"Ya allah ya tuhanku selamatkanlah anakku dri ujianmu amin. Mak ampunkan segala dosa2 anakanda"
"U tak ada salah ngn I. I ampunkan U dunia akhirat. I pun minta maaf byk2. Insyallah U will b ok. I luv U with al my heart. I will c u CM."
Everytime I read these, I cried..& I thought if I didn't make it during the op, at least I had the forgiveness from the most important people that matter..& of course I'd want The Almighty's forgiveness too..
Both Mak & hubby were outside the OT from 10am till after 5 pm when they were allowed to see me in the ICU. I woke up to see a wonderful face of Mak.

6 comments:

ila said...

huhuhu.. sedey aaa baca ceta u.. masa u dlm OT, i n kak pun x torah dok ooo.. sedey gler.. takut pun ada.. pakat dok gheyau kt umah.. esp bila mak kol bgtau doc pggl b.cik masuk OT.. masa tu lagi la hai.. otak ni dok pikiaq benda x bek ja.. mana taknya.. i cuma ada 2 org kakak jer. and u sorg jer yg suka buli i.. usik i.. marah i.. cubit i dgn kaki masa makan nasi.. esp masa zaman kecik2 dulu.. skr pun x berani ckp byk takut i gheyau lagi.. finally bila mak kol blk bgtau u msuk icu.. huh!! lega gler.. alhamdulillah... thanks to Allah for everything..

4AS said...

Ila,
Thanks to u too dear. Ur smses helped me a lot too. I appreciate ur motivations & encouragements. Happy sangat bla sedaq dpt tgk muka family members yg I syg. Allah maha mendengar doa2 kita semua. Syukur alhamdulillah..

Sizuka said...

Zuera,

Alhamdulillah everything dah ok sekarang. Didnt know that u lost that much blood!! Adik aku Mas, lost about the same amount of blood or maybe more masa bersalinkan Shariff dulu. Take care babe.

4AS said...

Shidah,
I'm a lot better now.. But, have to admit that recovery lmbt sikit compared to previous births. Jln pn tak kuat lg smpaikan Alysa & Ayra tegur knape mama jln slow..:-)
Mas ada complicn ke masa Shariff dulu?

cik ain | sweet thots said...

actually zura, to be frank, bila i didn't hear any news abt u kat fb, ur blog or our mailing list. cuak juga... wonder apa la khabar u.
alhamdulillah, semua dh selamat

4AS said...

Ain,
Thx. Alhamdulillah both bb & I are recovering well. I ada update kat FB a few days after the op masa still kat hospital..:-) now pn update fb & blog pakai iPhone je... Still sakit nak duduk lama2. This time byk internal injuries, kena lbh berhati2.